


That Smile

by Maxrimus



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Bi-Curiosity, F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-27
Updated: 2020-09-27
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:02:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26682634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maxrimus/pseuds/Maxrimus
Summary: Jester hangs out with Yasha and discovers feelings.
Relationships: Jester Lavorre/Yasha
Kudos: 11





	That Smile

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for a friend as a present for Bi Week. I'm personally a Beauster stan but my friend ships Yaster so here we are. No beta reader on this one, so I'm just posting it out there flaws and all. Enjoy the fluff!

I’m in my room in the Xhorhaus, writing a diary entry when I hear a light knock on my door. I know most people are out right now, doing errands or the like. I quickly hop over to the door, plastering the biggest smile on my face as I can. Opening the door I see Yasha, her usual stone and unreadable self. “Oh hi Yasha! Is everything ok? Did you want to talk to me?”

Yasha waits for me to finish, then nods after a moment. “Yes. Helo Jester. I was hoping you might want to accompany me on a quick shopping trip? I need some things and could use an extra pair of hands if that would be ok with you?”

“Of course! You know I’m always happy to help out my friends! Let’s go!” I say excitedly, linking arms with Yasha and pulling her out of the Xhorhaus. “So where are we going?”

Yasha and I walk through the city, stopping at a few places, gathering some groceries and some materials for upkeep on her weapons and armor. I chat excitedly the whole time; pointing out a cool looking sword in the armor shop, chatting excitedly with some children, and pulling a quick prank on a cranky shopkeep.

As we walk towards our final stop I notice a small smile on Yasha’s face, a rare treat from her. It’s nice to know I’m able to make her happy. “So what’s the last stop? Is it somewhere exciting? Did you find a new enchanter? Are we picking up gifts?”

Yasha again patiently waits through my questions then speaks, always surprisingly quiet for her size and intimidating presence. “Just a small flower shop. I was hoping to find some more flowers for my book.” I hum excitedly, following along with her, talking about various flowers I remember from back in Nicodranas.

As we approach I see what looks like a large greenhouse filled with all kinds of plant life. Yasha walks in ahead of me, and as I walk in behind I quiet for a moment, looking around at all the beautiful plant life. It’s surprising to see such abundant plant life here in Xhorhas, what with the lack of sun and all. But the plants here seem to be perfectly healthy and thriving, beautiful flowers and hearty looking saplings and creeping vines adorning every surface.

I look back to Yasha to talk to her about all of this and I see a look of complete calm on her face. For once, I feel like it might be better not to talk. I follow Yasha through the greenhouse while she looks at various flowers, smelling some, feeling the petals of others. Eventually she finds one, a flower that looks like a night black orchid and smells of rain. I see that small smile break out onto Yasha’s face again, although this time it’s twinged with a hint of sadness. She waits a few seconds before speaking. “The Night’s Rain, Zuala’s favorite flower.”

At that I felt the strangest pang of… hurt? Guilt? Longing? In my chest. I push whatever that feeling is down hard, putting on my brightest smile. I try to speak as quietly as Yasha. “It’s beautiful Yasha. Are you going to get it?”

She seems to contemplate for a moment before shaking her head. “Thinking about her is hard enough without a direct reminder. I just wanted to see it again.”

I nod my head, not really understanding but wanting to be sympathetic to my friend. “Well what is your favorite flower?”

Yasha pauses, seeming to mull the question over in her head. She opens her mouth as if to say something, then closes it before smiling softly and looking right at me. “Blue Irises.”

I feel myself flush for a second for some reason I can’t quite place my finger on. I nod, not really having words to match the situation, for the first time in a while. Yasha seems to understand, the small smile on her face remaining. “Well let’s go then.” And with that we return to the Xhorhaus, depositing our spoils.

***

Later that night Beau finally comes back from the library and I’m already waiting in her room. She seems surprised but doesn’t kick me out. She finds me pacing the room, obviously nervous, and a look of concern instantly fills her eyes. She approaches, putting a hand on my shoulder to stop my pacing. “Jess. What’s up? You look nervous about something.”

For the second time that day I have difficulties coming up with the right words, my mouth moving without making sound before I eventually squeak out. “Beauwhydoyoulikegirls?”

Beau blinks quickly for a second, obviously trying to process what I’d just said. As it finally seems to click she leads me over to the bed, sitting us both down. She thinks for a few more seconds before talking. “Well I guess girls are just better? I mean they’re definitely prettier than guys, and I tend to be able to connect with them better, I find them to be more empathetic. But also you’ve seen the kind of girls I like, I like big strong girls with muscles and really the muscles just.” She chuckles for a second. “A muscle-y chick will really just get me going. Plus.” She plasters a wry smile on her face. “Tits are great.”

I take some time to think and Beau lets me have it, patiently sitting by my side. “So. What was your first crush on a girl like? Was it all fanfare and fireworks? Did you instantly fall in love? Did you kiss her right away?”

Beau gives out a full belly laugh at the. “Gosh Jester you really need to stop reading all those romance novels. Real relationships really aren’t anything like that. I probably first had a crush on a girl around 12 or 13.” She thinks for a minute, arranging her thoughts. “I was at some party my dad was hosting for his business partners and there was a servant girl there. The daughter of our head caterer. For some reason I had never noticed her before but seeing her taking drinks around the room in her little tux.” Beau seems to shiver at the thought, a nostalgic smile on her face. “It wasn’t love at first sight, I didn’t sweep her off her feet or anything. I just started hanging out with her after that and we’d have some play dates and she’d laugh at my jokes and go along with my dumb plans and as we got closer as friends I realized I liked her as more than just friends.” She sighed, her face falling a little. “Unfortunately it turns out she didn’t… swing that way, if you catch my drift, and when I tried to confess it scared her away. Her father quit soon after, and I never saw her again.”

I frowned, going to put a hand on Beau’s shoulder. “Beau…” but she instantly plasters a smile back onto her face.  _ I’ll come back to this later. _

“But that’s enough about me. Why are you asking about if I like girls?” Beau suggestively wiggles her eyebrows. “You got your eye on someone?”

I blush furiously, practically turning my whole face purple. “What! No! That’s ridiculous! I’m. I’m not. What? I like guys. I. I can’t like girls. That’s ridiculous!”

Beau cackles, shaking her head, before looking back at me. “You know it doesn’t have to be one or the other right? You can be attracted to both guys and girls. I’m not, I’m girls all the way. But that doesn’t mean you can’t like both, if you want.”

I clamp my mouth shut at the sentiment. All the novels I’d read growing up had been about the strong man coming in to save the damsel. Sometimes it was reversed and the girl saved the guy, which I did love. But it had always been that way, a guy and a girl in love. It had never crossed my mind that there were other options. “Thanks Beau. You’ve. You’ve given me a lot to think about.” I pull her into a quick hug before getting up, smiling warmly at her.

“Yea no problem Jess, just make sure to invite me to the wedding.” She winks at me and I blush for half a second before laughing it off, heading back to my room.

***

Even later that night, after everyone else has gone to bed, Jester finds her way to the roof, surprised to find Yasha sitting with her back against the tree. “Oh! Hi Yasha. I didn’t think anyone else would be up this late.”

She turns to me, smiling warmly at the sight of me, making my heart go into overdrive. “Sorry Jester. I can leave if that would make you more comfortable?”

I almost cut her off in my nervous state. “Nononono! I don’t mind you being here. Actually I was hoping to talk to you about something. If you don’t mind me talking to you about things, that is.” I clamp my mouth shut after that, waiting for her response.

She waits only a second, nodding to me. “Of course Jester. I’m always happy to talk to you.”

I smile, walking over and sitting next to her. I pause for a couple of seconds, the both of us just staring up at the sky before I ask, quieter than I usually would be. “Yasha. Can you tell me about Zuala?”

Yasha is silent for a long couple of minutes. I’m about to apologize for bringing it up when she starts speaking, even quieter than I had been. “Zuala was amazing. Strong, smart, confident in herself. She made me giggle like a child just by being near me. Despite her intimidating presence she was incredibly kind and gentle, preferring to avoid violence if possible. She was everything I had wanted to be when I was younger but had been beaten out of me by my tribe.” She pauses for a moment before continuing. “But that is who she was. She’s been gone for years now. I miss her of course. But it’s been so long, I barely even remember her face anymore.” We lapse into a comfortable but charged silence. She seems to be waiting for me to say something.

I gather my thoughts and my courage and start speaking. “She does sound amazing. And you sound pretty amazing too, you grew from knowing her, and you kept growing even after her. You’re just as kind and gentle and strong as you thought she was. Or at least, I think you are.” I pause for just a moment, my face heating up. “You’re a very important person to me Yasha. And I’ve been thinking a lot about how I grew up and the stories I read and how they’re not true to real romance. We’ve been spending a lot of time together and I really like being with you and I wanted to know if…” I trail off, stumbling at the finish line. I try to force it out, to get across the last line but something within me is still holding me back.

Yasha turns to look at me, drawing my eyes up to hers with her look alone. She seems to know what I’m trying to say, and the same question seems to be in her eyes. She smiles, and my mind goes to fuzz as I notice how close we are. She asks in what is barely a whisper. “Jester? Would you like to go on a date with me sometime?”

And I melt. The walls fall. I nod eagerly, realizing the feelings I’d been holding backs for weeks now. “Yes! Yes Yasha of course I would!” I laugh in excitement, and the smile on Yasha’s face is brighter than the noon sun. I throw my arms around her neck and after a moment of surprise she wraps her arms around me. We stay that way for a few minutes, just enjoying each other’s presence. Eventually we break and Yasha’s smile is still there, still as beautiful as ever.

“Tomorrow then?” She asks, and I nod excitedly, and we go our separate ways. I fall asleep quickly, my dreams filled with that smile.


End file.
